Deep in thought

I watched a documentary not to long ago about a girl who had a heart transplant and then started having memories from the former person who had the heart. This got me thinking (I shouldn't do that because it can be lethal). What happens to our memories once we've gone... Do we simply take them with us, do they just fade away like a star along with our bodies? Who will remember the little things that may of once been big?

Somebody very close to me died when I was 14 and that person always had a camera in her hand, and I am thankful she did because now when I miss her so much it hurts I can look through her albums and remember what her hair smelt like, I can picture her perfectly painted nails and the way she applied her lipstick.

Now I own all of her memories, she took photos of everything and there are at least 10 photo albums in which she captured hundreds of moments, I now am very camera happy I take photos of everything I can in the hope that one day somebody will look back and go through my life in photos and say "She enjoyed her life, you can see".

I'm not scared of dieing, my dad once said to me it's the only sure thing in life, once your born you can't say what will happen, what you'll see or which route you decide to go down. But one thing is for sure, you will eventually die. But I am scared that my precious memories will not live on.

I think back to my childhood and although I am still young it feels like it was a fifty years ago. But when I look at a photo it takes me right back to when it was taken, sometimes even how I was feeling, I remember what was going on around me and the day I had. This is why I love photos so much, they bring the memory back.

I promoised Bambino when he was born I would never leave him, never. Now although I know this is virtually an impossible promise to keep because I will leave this planet before he will, however I will not leave while he still needs me, while he is dependant on me. But when I do eventually die, he will then have the key to my memories. All my photos, and keep sakes and I like to think he will show them off to his children and children's children, and I will be remembered, my tiny minute little stamp on the world will still be here when I'm not.

So take as many photos as you can, capture the people you hold dearest, remember the good times because one day somebody you may not even have met yet will look back on your life. and it's the only thing you may have to remember the good times you have put in a box in the deepest darkest corner of your mind.

You'll find it and smile.

{prophecyblur.com}